Cambodian Nuptials

I was wearing a pair of worn black pants, a bright pink polo shirt and flip flops. Somehow, it didn’t seem like appropriate dress for a Cambodian wedding. Yet in less than two hours I was to be on the back of my co-worker’s motorbike, off to celebrate the nuptials of my boss’s nephew. I wandered around the market after work, hoping I would find a wedding attire stall. Finally I struck up a conversation with a young woman selling clothes, CDs, luggage and wood carvings. She helped me pick out a floor-length pink skirt and a beaded top, and even loaned me her shoes for the evening. Most wedding guests wore dresses that took weeks to sew by hand, but she assured me that no one would think too badly of me since I was a foreigner.

I was the only white girl in a room of four hundred. Children craned their necks to spy on me as platters of food were set down and whisked away as quickly as they came. To the amazement of the children, I tried everything in front of me, from fish heads to fried crickets. A hush pulsed through the room as guests devoured more than six courses of food, the only sounds loud chewing and my chopsticks occasionally tumbling to the floor.

After we ate, the dancing began. Khmer dance, however, is nothing like your sweaty, hip-swinging middle school party. Young girls spend several painful hours each day with their wrists tied backwards in order to achieve the graceful bend that characterizes Khmer Apsara dancing. Motions are precise and graceful. My friends showed me how to swirl my hands to express the emotion and story of the song, rocking slowly back and forth on my heels as we tiptoed around the room.

As the lights twinkled on at the end of the night, we made our way to congratulate the bride and groom one last time before heading home. They were laughing and hugging, just like any other bride and groom in any other country in the world. Sometimes we aren’t as different as we think.

sunburns, jellyfish and mozzies: a weekend getaway to malaysia (part 1)

i know what you're thinking: wait, whatever happened to cambodia? well, it's amazing. the people are lovely, i'm learning so so much at the hospital and the town feels like home. but all that will have to wait just a little bit longer.

my visa ran out two wednesdays ago. sure, the hospital could have renewed it for a small fee. but a short trip out of the country seemed like a much more interesting method for visa renewal. i settled on kuala lumpur, malaysia (mainly because the flight was cheap). somehow, i managed to convince a coworker to join me. meet sallie, an icu nurse from australia. she's working at ahc for six months before embarking on a trek around south america. she has two children, both older than me. she only wears purple.

having reserved plane tickets but little else, we headed to the siem reap airport in mr. ron's tuk tuk. if i had told you about mr. ron the ivy 2 tuk tuk driver who had stolen my bike to send a friend to the market and returned it broken, you would understand why i was cranky about letting him drive us. but i didn't, so we'll leave that for another day.

after a turbulent plane ride and the longest airport shuttle journey in the whole world (why did they build the airport so far from the city?), we were in kuala lumpur. our first day was taken up entirely in transit, despite the fact that we had left early in the morning. we spent the night strolling through china town and discovering that we had left the concept personal space back in cambodia.

the chinatown night market was overflowing with smells and lights and people. hawkers grabbed our arms and blocked our path, seducing us with pirated dvds, reams of silk, watches, fake handbags...

the next day was a blur of sights. our first stop was masjid jamek, i think the first mosque i have ever seen. we wore robes and headscarves and wandered nervously about, desperately hoping that we wouldn't offend the worshippers. the building itself was austere, the grounds were peppered with palm trees in beds shaped like eight-pointed stars. sallie, who has traveled all through the middle east, was able to explain a bit about the symbols and practices. i was surprised by its simplicity but very glad to have made the detour.

we hopped on board a real train (!) and made our way to the city center. the petronus towers, the largest towers in the world until 2004, were supposed to be right in front of us, but we just couldn't find them... after a few moments, we noticed the gaggle of tourists gazing in awe up at a building as we craned our necks to see around it. a bit flustered and mumbling about how it was only that we couldn't see the other one, we walked around the base and finally admitted that it really was quite tall. the best part? the base is a gigantic shopping mall! i would not have thought that i would have any interest in western shops while traveling in malaysia, but after a month and a half of squat toilets, banana republic and auntie anne's pretzels were fabulously extravagant.

next we took an hour long hike in an effort to travel what appeared to be just a few blocks (tourist maps rock) and literally climbed up to the base of the KL tower, the third largest telecommunications building in the world. the view was lovely, as we hadn't been able to get tickets to go up in the petronus towers, though the free audio tour was over the top and we were mobbed by a pack of malaysian school children. we escaped to the nature walk below and were eaten alive by the mozzies. it was a beautful walk, though, and neither of us could believe that we were in the middle of a city as the trees were so thick around us.

although we had had quite enough with nature, we hopped on a train for the lake gardens, malaysia's (not so) central park. as it was growing late, we focused our energies on the bird sanctuary. i do like birds, but perhaps not that much, and i have never seen so many of them in one place in my life. there were peacocks wandering around the footpaths and little brown birds that spoke the most articulate malay and toucans and really annoying chirpy things that hung upside down on the ceiling and pooped on us as we walked through. we were both exhausted from our adventures but determined to see the waterfall. it was off for the evening. we got a taxi back to town.

we were both really excited about little india and the night market. most of sallie's clothes are indian style and i was hankering for some food! when we got there, however, all they sold, in the entire night market, was head scarves and stupid plastic toys that played it's a small world over and over again. we spent more time looking for a place to eat than in the stalls! and then we couldn't find a bathroom and it was getting late and we were getting cranky. perhaps it was just the culture shock of spending a whole day in a city?

we were both ready to be off the next morning, sallie eager to escape le village, our charming hell hole of a hostel and me excited about beaches and sunshine! we hopped on a plane and in a very turbulent hour, we were in penang.

i love laos.

after an easy hour plane ride from chiang mai, i was in laos! jim and i got ripped off trying to get a taxi into town. it turned out that the guest house i was hoping to stay at had shut down, so i wandered around khem khong with a backpack on each side. i finally found view khem khong, listed in the lp but a bit out of my price range. praise the low season! i got my favorite room yet for just $6 a night. they even gave me towels and little bars of soap. the best part? a genuine hot water shower - not one of those electrical thingamajigs. i am in heaven.

luang prabang in laos is an incredible little town. it is much, much more rural than chiang mai and still shows a bit of french influence (laos was occupied until 1953). it was even named a world heritage site by unesco in 1995!

we're on a little peninsula in a valley surrounded by mountains and jungle, right in between the mekong and nam khan rivers. there are only three main streets in the old town, one on each river bank and one in the middle with all of the restaurants and tour shops. the mekong is lined with little al fresco dining ventures, and i slipped into one right across the street from my guest house. i sat on a platform directly over the mekong surrounded by palm trees and fairy lights and enjoyed a little banana leaf package of fish and curry (a traditional lao dish!) as the sunset over the mountains. absolutely stunning!

i meandered around the old town for a bit before heading back to the guest house. without liz around, there was no one to stop me from going to bed at 8 o'clock!

the next morning i went for a walk to see the town in daylight. i wandered all the way down the main street to the point where the two rivers converge. on the way, a group of monks beckoned me into their wat. they were playing some game with black and white stones on a big checkboard, and i watched for a while trying to learn the rules. no such luck... after a while, i went to sit in the shade with a monk named alling. he is from a very small village in the north of laos, and he became a monk so that he could get an education. he is currently studying to get a degree in english so he can get a job as a tour guide. as we were talking, a few others drifted over, but most of them were quite shy and just listened with a smile.

by the time it cooled down enough for me to continue my walk, i bid farewell to my new friends and continued around the town. i met up with jim, who had made a new female friend (and another showed up over the course of the evening). alas, a new set of folks to keep me up late.

the next morning, i had planned on renting a bicycle to head further afield, but after the tenth tuk tuk had greeted me with "hey miss, waterfall?" i asked the price. a strapping young british lad invited me on his tour, for a fifth of what the other drivers were trying to charge me. i jumped at the chance and ran back to get my swimsuit. up the mountain!

there were nine of us in all, eight brits. one couple had been living in laos for almost a year, and their moms had come to visit. very cute. they spent a year teaching and traveling in china before coming to vientiane, and by the end of the ride they had helped me develop my own plan of escape. i've met a lot of people who have moved to the region, taught to save money and then traveled for months. it's much easier than most americans imagine!

back to the tuk tuk. the drive itself was gorgeous, through jungle and by smaller villages. after about an hour, we arrived at the waterfall entrance. it was a trek to get even just to the base, but along the way we passed an animal sanctuary with tigers and bears that had been rescued from poachers. at the very top i met a french woman who quit her job in the business sector and wants to go to medical school - at 33! she won't be fully qualified until after she's forty. if she can do it, i certainly can take a few years off to join the peace corps.

after a couple of hours hiking up, down and all around, i headed back to one of the swimming pools at the base where i met up with the british couples. this swimming hole was swarming with lao kids doing spectacular flips into the pool from a rope swing in the trees. i had a go - not quite spectacular. i did manage a pretty neat jump off one of the smaller waterfalls nearby!

i was exhausted and burnt by the time we got back hours and hours later, as i hadn't expected our trip to be so long. a great day, nonetheless, and much better than pittering around by myself on a bicycle in hundred degree heat.

i ventured the opposite direction from my usual path and discovered that there is a whole other part of town with bigger night markets and more cafes. i had dinner at a tiny vegetarian buffet cart on the side of the road surrounded by long tables so everyone just kind of mixed together. i met a group of kids who had just come back from a hardcore four day trek into the jungle. one (the only other american i've met in laos) is a third-year at reed and lives in the bay area. whenever i told anyone i was from california, they'd point to him and starting singing everyone's favorite eagles song.

we all headed off for a drink nearby, and they served us all lao lao (moonshine!) as we sat down. later that evening, i met up with a lao friend named loun to go to a local discoteque. i was definitely the only white girl there, but every lao kid in town made an appearance throughout the night and they were all really friendly. as usual, i got tired early, and loun let me drive his motorbike (manual) almost all the way back to my guesthouse until i stalled trying to turn a corner.

this morning i woke up early for a traditional lao cooking class. i've been so excited about it since before i got to lao, and i even paid 50 cents for a tuk tuk there so i wouldn't be late. when i got there, a girl told me they had cancelled the class because i was the only one who had signed up. first of all, they information sheet says they still run individual classes. secondly, i had signed up only the night before and it would have been very apparent then there weren't going to be any more takers. so i missed out on cooking and my trek which was only running on friday. what a bust! i fumed all the way back to town and now here i am. luckily, i'm fairly confident that a lao massage will make me feel much better. off i go!

my first friend and a near death experience

for dinner last night, i found a food stall without any english signs. what would you like? what do you have? noodles. okay. i'll have that. chicken or pork? chicken. we don't have chicken. actually, i really wanted pork anyway. isn't thailand grand?


today i went on one of those adventure treks where they load everyone into a van and then head into the jungle. elephant riding and mountain biking in the morning, then white water river rafting in the afternoon. they promised us the best rafting in all of southeast asia! i met an australian girl named liz who had been traveling through thailand for almost a month. she's a nurse in perth and spent time with her sister on the islands before heading up to chiang mai by herself.


liz and i decided to share an elephant and we had a great time bouncing around on top while it refused to follow any of the directions of the guide. it actually used its ear to pull my flip flop off my foot. we gave it bananas and all was well. after about an hour, we drove onward to the base of our mountain biking adventure.


i had imagined that they would drive us to the top of some hill and we would zoom down, splashing through rivers and barely seeing the jungle around us. there was a bit of splashing, i guess, and i was proclaimed the muddiest by the end. but that bike trip was not a nice coast down a mountain. we had to ride up to the top! liz and i huffed and puffed along while this chipper couple from denver zoomed ahead and landed with breath still in their chests. at one point, i heard a magnificent pop and realized that i had a flat tire, further delaying our arrival. i really thought i wasn't going to make it, but after nearly two hours, we finally reached rafting base camp.


four to a boat. liz and i shared one with louie, a swiss marine, and a very friendly older german man that liz said was probably here for the women. our guide was definitely the most fun and the least safe. we spent a fair bit of time learning all of the commands and practicing on land before we got on the water. the ride down the river was very exciting with a few class four rapids. i fell out of the raft at one point and our guide pulled me in right at the last moment...


there were four boats in all from two different tours (the others had done atvs in the morning), and we had races and splashing wars and it was all great fun, except for this poor israeli girl who looked as if she were ready to murder someone and hid in the bottom of the boat the entire time. we played helicopter, which is basically a game where the boat flips over the the guides all laugh at us. the good parts were caught on video, though! i bought a copy just for the footage of my grand tumble.


by then end, we were all exhausted but it was definitely the most exciting (and expensive) day yet. liz was staying at the sk with me, so we headed back to change then wandered around town to the night bazaar. if i weren't going to be here for three more months, i would have bought the entire place. they had lights and wall hangings and boxes and notebooks and skirts and paintings and anything one would want except for an american to thai electrical adapter. after a few hours wandering we got ourselves thai massages, but they weren't very good so we got foot massages to make up for it. i tried this really weird water chestnut coconut thing and liz just stuck to tea, the smartie. at least i got to try something new?


it started absolutely spitting down. my first rain! so we ended up tuk-tuking back to our guesthouse. it was also my latest night. liz made me stay out until nearly 11!


the next morning, i got up early to go visit wat doi suthep, a half hour drive outside of the city on the top of a mountain. the sawngthaew for the journey wait until they fill up before they leave, and i guess no one else had the idea of going in the early morning light. i ended up waiting around for nearly an hour before my driver agreed to go with three. while i was waiting, though, i got these delicious little things from a street cart. i still have no idea what was in them. and fresh pineapple! the fruit in this country is outstanding.


i met an english fellow named jim who had quit his job in the mobile phone business to travel the world. he's been gone for nine months and still has six to go! south america, the us, australia, now southeast asia. it turned out that he was on the same flight out to laos that afternoon, so we hung out at the wat and arranged to meet again later at the airport.


the wat was beautiful. it's quite a trek up the mountain, though. the driver dropped us off at the bottom of more than 300 stairs. the view from the top would have been spectacular were it not for the mist that completely enveloped the mountain. it was still breathtaking, though.


the wat is considered one of the most sacred temples in the north of thailand. many years ago, the king put a buddha relic on the back of a white elephant and sent it wandering around the countryside. it found its way to the mountain top and promptly died, and they kept the relic exactly where it landed and built the temple around it. cool story.


jim is into photography as well, and we spent about an hour taking pictures around the grounds. then it was back to town to get ready for the plane ride and a brand new country!

rainforests, hill tribes and trains. chiang mai!

oh my gosh, that was so clever. get it? lions and... anyway, i took the overnight train from bangkok to chiang mai and arrived early this morning. the train was actually quite fun! unfortunately, i was seated next to a quiet old thai man rather than a strapping young lad, and this italian woman a seat over starting yelling into her cell phone at five in the morning, and this chinese girl was running around in her underwear, but overall, thumbs up. around seven o'clock the train men came around and magically turned all of the seats into bunk beds. i was on the top, which was fine by me as i normally sleep in a loft. so after dinner, i climbed up onto my bed and fell asleep at my usual time of 8pm.

but first, a crisis. think zancudo. but this time, instead of angry fishermen with knives, i was facing angry thai officials with guns. somehow, all of my baht had disappeared and i had already ordered dinner. i panicked for a while. i ran and hid in the bathroom. then i thought of a brilliant plan. i struck up a conversation with some friendly chinese kids (one of them was in her underwear). the first few didn't speak english. finally, i convinced one of them to sell me baht. this doesn't sound that scary right now. but at the time, i seriously thought i was going to be arrested or shot or something awful. anyway, i made it to chiang mai intact and got a room at the sk guesthouse. it is the cutest little place ever. it even has a pool! and a sink, and an electrical outlet! i am in an odd island room with windows on three sides. i do have a little balcony that looks over the pool, and there are lovely sitting areas in the lobby. i dropped my bags and headed out for a walk around the neighborhood.

chiang mai is nearly eight hundred years old, and the old city is surrounded by a moat and a big wall. i walked along the moat for a bit. then, i accidentally stumbled upon wat chiang man, which was exactly where i was hoping to end up. it has two buddhas made of crystal and marble. i'm not quite sure i managed to find them, but it had a few very pretty temples, and it is the oldest wat within the city's walls. i met a man named chiang who offered to take me around to the sights. i, unable to say no to anyone ever, agreed. first, we went to wat suan dok, where the royal family spends the winter. the east part of the wat seemed almost like a cemetery with dozens of white monuments filling a courtyard. it had a beautiful chedi in the center and good luck bells all around. next, we went to wat phra singh, built in 1345 under the lanna kingdom. on the way back to my guesthouse, my driver surprised me with wat chedi luang. it actually took my breath away. i suppose it might be the first big ruin i've seen in asia. an enormous indiana jones temple reaches up out of the middle, and white elephants guard the perimeter. quite stunning.

the tuk tuk drivers in thailand offer some really stellar deals if you are willing to be dragged around to shops in the city. some shops will give the drivers gas just for bringing tourists, even if they don't buy anything. i had already been to two tailors, two TATs (tourist authorities) and a market. chiang decided he wanted me to see the entire eastern market, featuring a gem shop, furniture store, rug maker, umbrella craftsmen, fan wizard... i politely declined after the first three. some of the shops are very interesting, actually. the gem store had a big warehouse with demonstrations of the stages of jewelry production, and the carpet shop gave me a demonstration of the weaving process. if only i had $17,000 to spend on a carpet.

chaing told me that he could take me to see the long neck tribe, and i decided it might be good so i could spend the next day in the jungle. we drove to a fake hill tribe village not too far out of town. i have mixed feelings about tribal village visits (and similar thoughts about visiting temples. i think it is very intrusive to people who are actually worshipping) because the villagers are in such a subordinate position. the hill tribes in thailand don't have legal rights. they have to pay to live in their villages here and are not allowed to leave or go into the cities. tourists pour into the villages every day, stripping the people of their privacy and autonomy. i hoped that the fake village would be better because the people there choose to live there, and they are paid for every tourist that comes through. when i got there, however, i realized that the people there were only there because their alternative is utter poverty. all of their expenses are covered in the village, from food and government fees to medical care. almost all of the money they earn selling handicrafts is sent back to their families and the village they left behind. some families come together, but those that come alone might not ever see their families again. i actually started crying as i walked up the path to the village. i felt like i was visiting a zoo.

i got to talk to a few of the women in the village. they were very friendly and willing to answer my questions about their lives and tribes. once i walked away, however, they went back to their craft and waited for the next tourist to stroll by. i got to speak with one of the managers, chi chi, who is hoping to learn english while working in the village so that he can eventually be a tour guide in the city. most of the villagers, however, would never even have that opportunity as they are denied citizenship in the country.

i know it seems hypocritical that i took photos of the women while i was in the village, but chi chi said that the most important thing is to educate the public about the hill tribes so that their traditions are not lost with the waves of tourists that pass through their villages every day. i think that many of the villagers here might not mind tourists, as long as they are willing to stop to talk and learn about the culture. i spent the most time talking to the kayang girls. they explained that the metal rings are placed on their necks when they are five years old, and taken off every few years to be lengthened. an eighteen year old said that hers weighs 5kg and that it hurts a little bit. she was proud to wear it, though, because it symbolizes the traditions of her tribe. the photos here are both of kayang, but i also met people from the white karen (like chi chi), palong and lahu tribes.

i left the village with a whirlpool of thoughts rattling around in my brain. we have to save the environment. now, before it is too late. we have to work as hard as we can to stop poverty and exploitation. we have to work to improve the standard of living for every person on this earth without eroding the traditions that make us unique and valuable contributors. oh god, this is only day four.

belated adventures in bangkok

i finally arrived at the marco polo (they claim to be not only right in the heart of the action, but right next to and above the action, too!) around noon, and after a shower i decided to go for a stroll around the area. i met a very friendly thai man who offered me advice on where to go. it turned out he wanted to drive me to all of those places. he seemed nice, i accepted, and i was off on my first tuk tuk ride in thailand.

we went to some of the temples around the area, and he dropped me off in chinatown. i took a boat back up the river, but it didn't stop at the right pier. i disembarked at my first opportunity and followed the white people on board, hoping they would lead me back to khao san. they did. i passed out by eight o'clock. whoo hoo jet lag. one more day in bangkok...

i woke at seven the next morning and went out for a morning walk. i ended up on a very charming little soi that branched off one of the larger streets. early in the morning, the heat is just starting to build itself up and a breeze floats along the sidewalks. i found a cafe filled with thai people and had fresh mango and orange juice. we were far away from the sounds of traffic along khao san and it was the most delightful morning i've had in a long time.

by noon, i had made my way to the grand palace. most of it is not used anymore except for special ceremonies. i think it may have been the heat, but i was cranky and unimpressed. women are not allowed to wear capris (though they can wear skirts at the same length), so i had to borrow a wrap around which i brilliantly threw on over my clothes. by the end, i was so hot i barely managed to walk out of the compound.

the big attraction is this little jade buddha they have hidden way up on an incredibly opulent two story pedestal completely covered in diamonds and emeralds and everything shiny. it had been covered in plaster for decades, but one day it was knocked over and the plaster cracked, revealing the jade core. neat story. it reminded me a bit of the mona lisa, though: huge crowds and an itty bitty little thing that's pretty cool but maybe not worth that whole big wait. i waddled (i had done my skirt too tightly) around the rest of the grounds and headed out for a watermelon fruit shake. wonderfully refreshing.

i almost didn't make it to wat pho because i was so tired and hot and cranky. i'm glad i went, though, because it was definitely my favorite part of the short time i spent in bangkok. the main temple features an enormous (we are talking huge) golden reclining buddha. it was so incredible i went around twice. there were far fewer people at this wat, probably because they were all in line at the grand palace, and fewer still beyond the main temple. most of the grounds were under renovation, but one could still maneuver around the scaffolding to go inside some of the other temples. they were more simply decorated than the grand palace but conveyed a much more spiritual meaning. my favorite was a tiny room with a sitting buddha made of gold. outside, the walls were lined with glass cases of buddhas made out of gold, bronze, marble, stone...

after wat pho, i decided it was time for my first thai massage. i retraced my morning's steps to shewa spa, a wonderful little place hidden down a soi near khao san. okay, so nobody bothered to tell me that thai massage is hard. it requires moving and twisting and stretching and is nothing like a massage you might get in the states. nonetheless, i left feeling light as a feather and am confident that a few more could knock me into fair shape.

finally, i walked back to khao san to collect my bags and head to the train station. on to chiang mai!

the yellow polo. official uniform of team bangkok

my journey began as all epic southeast asian journeys should: in a fleabag motel on khao san road. my room contained a bed, mirror, fan and door which opened directly into the shower. no blankets, no toilet paper, no towels. it was exactly as i had imagined it.

my train is leaving for chiang mai in a few minutes, so more news when i get up north. but i'm here, i'm safe and i'm having great fun. much love!